Yoga for wine Lovers

A must see, click link above.

Every time I start thinking too much
about how I look,
I just find a Happy Hour
and by the time I leave,
I look just fine.

Every time I hear the dirty word 'exercise',
 I wash my mouth out with chocolate.

The Knob

If this doesn't make you laugh, you're dead!!!!

A woman visited a plastic surgeon who told her about a
new procedure called 'The Knob,' where a small
knob is placed at the top of the woman's head and
could be turned to tighten up her skin and produce the
effect of a brand new face-lift.

Of course, the woman
wanted 'The Knob.'Over the course of the years, the woman tightened the knob,
and the effects were wonderful, the woman remained young
looking and vibrant.

After fifteen years, the woman returned to the surgeon
with two problems.

'All these years, everything has been working just
fine. I've had to turn the knob many times and I've
always loved the results. But now I've developed
two annoying problems:

First, I have these terrible
bags under my eyes and the knob won't get rid
of them.'The doctor looked at her closely and said, 'Those
aren't bags, those are your breasts.'She said, 'Well, I guess there's no point in asking
about the goatee.'

The Deaf Wife Problem

Bert feared his wife Peg wasn't hearing as well as she used to and he thought she might need a hearing aid.

Not quite sure how to approach her, he called the family Doctor to discuss the problem.

The Doctor told him there is a simple informal test the husband could perform to give the Doctor a better idea about her hearing loss.

'Here's what you do,' said the Doctor, 'stand about 40 feet away from her, and in a normal conversational speaking tone see if she hears you. If not, go to 30 feet, then 20 feet, and so on until you get a response.'

That evening, the wife is in the kitchen cooking dinner, and he was In the den. He says to himself, 'I'm about 40 feet away, let's see what happens.'Then in a normal tone he asks, 'Honey, what's for dinner?'
No response..
So the husband moves closer to the kitchen, about 30 feet from his wife and repeats, 'Peg, what's for dinner?'
Still no response.

Next he moves into the dining room where he is about 20 feet from his Wife and asks, 'Honey, what's for dinner?'
Again he gets no response.

So, he walks up to the kitchen door, about 10 feet away. 'Honey, what's for dinner?'
Again there is no response.

So he walks right up behind her. 'Peg, what's for dinner?'

(I just love this)

'For God's sake, Bert, for the FIFTH time, CHICKEN!'